by Graham Earnshaw
Berlin, Earthday April 22, 1990

My name is Harold, my life is so merry,
I’m a ripening, succulent, blood-red strawberry
My brothers and sisters and I live so well
We are tended and nurtured by good farmer Bell.

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Oh we love him so much, he is so good to us
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp He guards us and helps us like no one else does
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp He’s selfless and kind and he tends us with care
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Farmer Bell is a saint with compassion to spare.

Good Farmer Bell was around us today
And I’m sure I distinctly did hear him say
That we strawberries soon would be ready to sell.
He will pick us and sell us! Oh! cruel Farmer Bell!

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Oh we hate him so much, he is making us fat
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Just to kill us and sell us, no more than that!
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Our fate, we now find, is that we will be eaten.
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp But will we give in? No, we will not be beaten.

My name is Harold, I am no fairy
I’m a desperate cold kamikaze strawberry.
I will have my revenge on old Farmer Bell.
For this treacherous act, I will send him to hell.

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Oh we hate him so much, we will do what we must
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp To bring Farmer Bell to an end that is just.
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp He deceived us, he doesn’t love us at all
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp He will sell us for money, does that not appall?

But how can I kill him? Farmer Bell is so huge
And I’m a petite little strawberry rouge
I could throw myself at him when he comes around,
Put out his eye and knock him to the ground.
Then we could block up his mouth and his nose
Until he stopped breathing. Oh, do you suppose
That would work? Maybe not. I know what we need
A professional assassin to handle the deed.
But we don’t have the money, the strawberries cried
Harold was silent. And then he replied:
I know what I’ll do. I will eat pesticide
Until poison chemicals fill my inside
Then I will make Farmer Bell want to eat me.
I’ll poison him dead. He will not defeat me.

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Oh we hate him, we hate him, we hate Farmer Bell
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp We hate him much more than we can ever tell
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp He wants to kill us, but we’ll kill him first
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp From the moment he raised us, his life has been cursed.

Here he comes now! Farmer Bell, oh please stop!
Pick me and eat me! I’m the best of the crop!
He’s done it! He plucked me, he’s chewing me well!
Argghhh! There go the poisons to kill Farmer Bell.

&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp You killed him, oh Harold, Kamikaze strawberry
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp You’ve sent a message which is clear, oh so very
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp Strawberry liberation rules okay
&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp&nbsp It’s kill or be killed on the farms of today.

the end